Random thoughts and honest self-reflection on a Sunday

This week I had a long discussion with my professor outside of class. We talked about what it is going to take for me to finally take myself seriously. I have discovered that many people like myself form small groups and we share ideas and opportunities and stuff like that when we need to “get serious.” I know this probably sounds crazy to some of you but learning more and more about networking has opened my eyes to a world I never knew existed. To be fair, its just not something that was ever necessary at this capacity in my last career but looking back sure would have helped a lot if I knew how to do it better.

I mean lets be real, when we wander around in this awesome military world, and spend most of our time feeling like as long as we do what we are told, we will get what we deserve. When you are really busy with your military job you don’t spend much time learning about what the corporate world considers “networking.” What’s crazy is, Chief told me I had been networking for a long time and never realized it. I’m finally learning what he was talking about and that’s awesome!

I think the greatest hurdle for achieving a higher purpose after we’ve fallen off our rails is realizing we are going to make a fool of ourselves while we are “figuring things out.” Not being willing to learn from these mistakes or even worse, not being willing to make mistakes in the first place only serves to hold us back. If we play it safe all of the time we never truly learn what our limits and abilities are. Over the past six months I have made so many mistakes and made a complete fool of myself, all I can do is pick my goofy self-back up off the street and keep marching on. I decided I was going to do this and if I don’t figure out what “this” is supposed to be, it simply won’t happen. But what does that even mean? How will I even know what “this” is? I know this is probably a little confusing.

When I say I don’t know how to march forward with this career I mean just that. I certainly know what my end goal is: to re-enter the workforce in the wonderful world of Psychology. I’m on-track with my educational goals, I’m on-track with my audio/visual presentation goals (I take feedback on my Blog and Youtube content serious enough to try and make it better), I’m on-track with my short term goals but I admit my long term goals have not gotten as much attention as I would like. I’m lacking yes, but I’m figuring it out. Trying to at least.

I’d like you all to know something. What I’m feeling is perfectly normal. And I think that is why it is so important for me to share this with others. It’s normal for us to doubt and question and wonder if we even know what we are talking about or if anyone in this world (let alone ourselves) should take us seriously. Admitting to myself I have all these questions just reminds me of how serious I decided to take this new career since losing control of my life before retiring. I wish I could say there isn’t a little bit of me that wants to flash forward a few years from now and throw my awesome new career I worked hard to build in the face of the people who have been the most critical of me. Throwing things in other people’s faces will get me nowhere, least of all where I am trying to go. I need to concentrate my efforts on getting what I want by chasing after it. I need to ignore the doubters and the naysayers “I” have kept in my life in the past and sometimes still do. I need to continue making wiser choices than I have in the past.

I can do this. I know I can.

You’re Welcome. Internet.

Sometimes I just chillax and vibe when I write. You should totally give it a try!

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